Skipping a "Heart Beat"

Remember a moment when you hardly could breathe,

Your heart sounded to pause and you became mum,

You could think of nothing but just that one pain,

Amusing it is, the giver doesn’t even realize how it feels.

You want to share, you want to shout it out,

But you are scared of the world and the fear of being mediated,

Everyone around you seems to be noticing you,

You feel like the biggest loser as you yourself gave path to it.

I feel exactly the same like you my dear friend,

I have two paths, either to forget it or to keep it forever,

Either ways I know I am in no way winning,

As this game was a trap which was made for me to lose.

People say it’s the supernatural spirit who makes it all happen.

My question to that so called soul is- Are you skipping your heartbeat?

I remember my grandma telling that God always does well,

If that’s how it is then who is this who is making all this happen.

I am asked to move on, I am given lot of suggestions,

Like it’s nothing new and that everyone undergoes this,

Then why is it that everyone except me seems happy and smiling

And I am the only one undergoing this inner agony.

I know this is not the first time but its hurts deeper,

Than even the last time and I can’t remember how ever,

I came out of it as it feels this is the end,

My world seems having me lost around so many strangers.

Yes I do pretend, I do act,

I perform every day to show that fake smile,

When within I am dying each second with each memory,

Just wishing for some ray of hope for my heart to beat.